Myth Monday [14]: “The more Enneagram labels I stack, the better I know myself.” There is a strange trend of treating the Enneagram like a collection game. People introduce themselves with long strings of lore: instincts, wings, tritypes, stackings, variants of variants, as if the goal were to build the most elaborate Enneagram bio possible. In the extreme, you end up with something like “sp/so/sx 4w5 so/sx/sp 3 sx/sp/so 6w5 so/sp/sx 7 sx/so/sp 8w9 sp/sx/so 9”… which sounds impressive, but what does it actually do for you in real life? The more labels you pile on, the easier it becomes to decorate yourself instead of changing yourself. Every behaviour can be explained away by some extra code, and the focus quietly shifts from “What is not working in my life and how can I fix it?” to “How do I describe myself as precisely as possible inside the system?” It feels like refinement, but it often becomes a way to avoid the discomfort of picking one main strategy and...
Posts
Sundays with the Enneagram The “Three Centres” Myth – Part 7: If You Really Want Three Domains, Look at the Instinctual Biases (But… Still No Proof) At this point it should be clear that the traditional head, heart, and gut centres do not cleanly describe how the nine types actually function. If someone still insists on having three basic human domains, a far more plausible home for them is in the instinctual biases, not in the centres. Preserving, Navigating, and Transmitting already point to three survival-relevant directions of attention that everyone shares, rather than trying to lock whole types into three unequal buckets. A “certainty” or safety domain sits much more naturally with the Preserving bias: attention to resources, security, health, and what is needed to keep life going. A “bonding” domain aligns far better with Navigating, which is about group belonging, roles, alliances, and knowing how one fits into the social fi...
Playful Friday [13]: You might be a Preserver if… Your kitchen cupboards are organised by category, expiry date, and a backup system for the backup system. You've said "just in case" more times today than most people say it in a week. You go to the supermarket for three things and come back with seventeen, because you might need them. You have a running list of everything that needs fixing in the house, another list of who can fix it, and a third list of when you last checked the first two lists. You don't like talking about money. You just quietly make sure there's enough of it. Your home is your castle. Unannounced visitors are technically an invasion. You've already thought about what you'd do if the heating breaks, the car breaks down, and the Wi-Fi goes out — ideally all at once. "Spontaneous weekend away" is not a holiday. It's a stress test. The Preserving instinct is not about being boring ...
Communication Wednesday [13]: Type One Type Two When Ones and Twos get along, they can be a quietly powerful pair: “I’ll make it right” meets “I’ll make it better for you.” Both care about being good people and doing the right thing, and both often feel responsible for fixing what’s wrong around them. That shared sense of duty can make them feel like natural allies at work and at home. But they usually organise that duty differently. Ones tend to focus on systems, standards, and “how things should be,” while Twos focus on people, feelings, and “how you are doing.” So a One may think they are helping by correcting a process, while a Two feels unseen because no one asked how they were. A Two may think they are helping by stepping in personally, while a One experiences it as messy, boundary‑blurring, or “not the proper way.” If you are a One with a Two: Say explicitly that you see their care, not just the task they did “wrong.” Watch the ton...
Myth Monday [13]: “The Enneagram must be a spiritual tool, because it was designed as one.” It is true that the Enneagram of personality grew out of a strongly spiritual context. Oscar Ichazo, founder of the Arica School, developed his system as a path to higher states of consciousness, combining meditation, ritual, and “protoanalysis” in an explicitly esoteric training aimed at enlightenment, not at coaching or HR workshops. He mapped ego-fixations, passions, holy ideas and virtues onto the enneagon and, over time, created a very large number of enneagram-based schemas (Arica speaks today of 108 enneagrams, most of which were never part of mainstream personality teaching). The first problem is that “spirituality” is a very murky concept. For some people it means mystical practice, for others religious faith, for others a sense of meaning and values, and for many it simply means “woo-woo stuff I do not trust.” Treating the Enneagram as inh...
Sundays with the Enneagram The “Three Centres” Myth – Part 6: If Any Type Can Be “Head,” What Does Head Even Mean? If the head centre really captured people who “live in their minds,” then 5, 6, and 7 would all share a clearly distinct, thinking-first style that other types lack. In reality, each of them can be argued just as convincingly into other supposed domains, which again shows how loose and shape-shifty the whole head/heart/gut scheme actually is. Take Type 5. The stereotype is “pure head,” yet many 5s are extremely sensitive, not only emotionally but also to sound, light, smell, and social intrusion. It often looks as if they had to build a kind of emotional and sensory buffer to protect themselves from the messiness of the world, retreating to reduce overwhelm; that is easy to read as a deeply feeling type whose heart is so exposed that withdrawal becomes a defensive move, rather than as a coldly cerebral creature. Type 6 can fit into e...
Playful Friday [12]: Type 9 Type 9s strive to feel peaceful: they scan for tension, conflict, and disharmony, wanting enough calm and inclusion to stay connected without feeling friction or pressure to choose sides. Their energy often smooths edges and bridges gaps, creating space for everyone to coexist comfortably. Type 9 is likely to say: “I see both sides, and maybe there’s a way to do a bit of each.” “Let’s not rush; things have a way of working out if we give them time.” “It’s fine either way; whatever keeps things smooth for everyone.” “I’m not avoiding deciding, I’m just waiting until it’s clearer for all of us.” “Why fight when we could just find the middle ground?” “I tend to go along because harmony usually matters more than being right.” “My superpower? Making a room feel okay even when no one agrees.” “I don’t have strong opinions; I have strong preferences for peace.” Type 9 is unlikely to ...
Communication Tips Wednesday [12]: Type 9 (Striving to feel Peaceful) Type 9s tend to be easy‑going, receptive communicators who listen well and try to include different perspectives. They often downplay their own priorities and speak in a soft, indirect way to avoid tension, which can make them seem agreeable but also unclear or disengaged. Tips for Type 9s: When you share your view, add a clear “for me, what matters most is…” so others can actually hear your preference instead of only your agreement. If you feel yourself drifting or checking out in a conversation, gently bring yourself back by naming one concrete thing you think or want, even if it feels small. Practice stating your opinions in simple, direct sentences before softening or qualifying them, so your voice does not get lost in hedging language. Tips for communicating with Type 9s: Invite their perspective explicitly and give them ...
Myth Monday [12]: Transmitting Myth: “The Transmitting Instinctual Bias is the same as the Sexual or one‑to‑one instinct.” Reality: In many Enneagram traditions, the “sexual/one‑to‑one instinct” is framed mainly as intensity in close relationships or attraction, often focused on a special other. In the ATA approach, the Transmitting Instinctual Bias is about something wider: making an impact, leaving a legacy, and sending a strong signal into the world through broadcasting and narrow‑casting. Transmitters want their presence, ideas, talents, or story to land somewhere and do something, whether that is with many people or a carefully chosen few. Transmitting is not the same as simply preferring one‑to‑one contact. A strong Preserving bias often prefers one‑to‑one interactions too, but for safety, comfort, depth, or practicality, not because of a drive to broadcast, shine, or “make a dent in the universe.” Using the...
Sundays with the Enneagram The “Three Centres” Myth – Part 5: If Any Type Can Be “Heart,” What Does Heart Even Mean? If the heart centre were really a precise category, the “feeling types” 2, 3, and 4 would clearly organise life around emotional experience and relationship, in a way that other types do not. But once you look more closely at how they actually function, you can just as easily reframe each of them into other supposed domains, which again shows how elastic and unhelpful the head/heart/gut groupings really are. Take Type 2. The usual story is “heart type, focused on feelings and relationships,” yet 2s also move with a very strong sense of agency: they instinctively step in, take charge of helping, anticipate needs, and go straight into action without being asked. Their helping is not only emotional; it is practical, strategic, and often quite pushy, so with only a small shift of emphasis they can be framed as an agency type whose main tactic happe...
Playful Friday [11]: Type 8 Type 8s strive to feel powerful: they scan for weakness, control, and impact, wanting enough strength and autonomy to protect what matters without being vulnerable or controlled. Their energy pushes directly toward what they see as real, cutting through fluff to make things happen or stand up for justice. Type 8 is likely to say: “Let’s cut to what actually matters and get it done.” “Who’s really running this, and are they up to it?” “I’m not angry, I’m just not pretending everything is fine when it isn’t.” “If you want it weak, do it without me; I build things to last.” “Say what you mean, or don’t waste my time with hints.” “I’ll protect what’s mine, and I expect you to do the same.” “Half-measures are for people who don’t mind failing slowly.” “Bring your full strength; I respect nothing less.” Type 8 is unlikely to say: “I’m fine waiting quietly while someone else f...
Communication Tips Wednesday [11]: Type 8 (Striving to feel Powerful) Type 8s tend to be direct, energetic, and assertive communicators, moving quickly to what they see as the core issue. They often speak with intensity and conviction, which can be experienced as refreshingly honest and protective, but also as intimidating or too forceful for some people. Tips for Type 8s: Before jumping in, briefly check whether others are ready for your input (“Can I be direct here?”), which can soften the impact without diluting your message. Name your protective intention when challenging someone or something (“I’m pushing on this because I want it to be strong”), so people feel your backing, not just your pressure. Notice when your volume or intensity rises and consciously slow your pace or lower your voice a little, especially with more sensitive listeners, so they can stay engaged instead of shutting down. Tips for communicat...
Myth Monday [15]: “I’ve been studying the Enneagram for 10 years, so I really get it.” People often say “I’ve been studying the Enneagram for 5/10/20 years” as if the duration proves depth, insight, or usefulness. But what does that actually mean? You can spend years reading books, watching videos, and collecting concepts without changing a single pattern in your everyday life. Time spent around the Enneagram is not the same as time spent using it. For the system to become actionable, you do not need decades. You need roughly an hour of honest work: identify your instinctual bias, see which of the nine strategies you lean on the most, and start experimenting with doing something different in real situations. From there, what matters is not “I’ve been studying the Enneagram for X years,” but “I’ve been applying it in my own life for years,” or, if you teach or coach, “I’ve seen the same patterns and the same kinds of solutions ...
Myth Monday [11]: Navigating Myth: “The Navigating Instinctual Bias is the same as the Social instinct.” Reality: In many Enneagram schools, the “social instinct” is described mainly as enjoying groups, being outgoing, or liking to be around people. The Navigating Instinctual Bias in the ATA approach is less about being sociable and more about tracking the workings of the group: who is connected to whom, who is trustworthy, how status and roles are arranged, and how information and favours move through the network. A strong Navigating bias can show up in quiet people as much as in extroverts: they may be reserved, but still scan for patterns in alliances, reputation, and power, remembering who helped whom and who can be relied on. Reducing this to “social = likes people and parties” misses the core: Navigating is about understanding group dynamics, identity, and place in the bigger picture, not just about being friendly or talkative.
Sundays with the Enneagram The “Three Centres” Myth – Part 4: If Any Type Can Be “Gut,” What Does Gut Even Mean? If the gut centre were really a clear psychological category, the “body types” 8, 9, and 1 would all obviously share a distinctive way of processing life through instinct, action, and anger. Instead, by tweaking the story a little, each of them can be rehomed into a different supposed domain just as convincingly, which shows how loosely the labels are actually being used. Take Type 8. The standard narrative says “gut type, anger, action, body,” yet 8s are also some of the most obviously emotional characters on the diagram: they do not shy away from strong feelings, they often express them directly, and they can be intensely protective, sensitive, and tender with family or the inner circle. You only have to shift the spotlight from their muscles to their passion and fierce attachment to “their people” to make a very plausible case that 8s belong in ...